The Cool Mom

I have started re-watching “The Cosby Show” – introducing my daughter to the classics- and I am realizing how different it is to watch this show, that I loved so much as a kid, now as an adult. I felt the same way watching “thirtysomething” after I got married and became a thirtysomething. When I watched them before, they were enjoyable, but all the relationships were sort of theory. I didn’t really have anything to compare them to. Now I am seeing where I got some of my habits, my sayings and some of my values. My daughter laughed out loud when Claire Huxtable was sternly warning Vanessa about something or other. She said, “Mom that is soooo you.” I took that as a compliment since I think she was the most realistic mom on TV, in the way that she dealt with her children. She lost her temper sometimes and grumbled under her breath about them, but she also managed to be there for them in gentle ways too. She was not their best friend; she was their mother.
It is hard because sometimes I want to be the “cool mom”, but I always remember that my mom was never afraid to be the bad guy and I loved her for it later. Sometimes it even worked to my advantage. I was what some would call a bit of a goody-two-shoes in high school. I had fun, but never did the hard partying or anything. I was invited to a few parties that I knew would be a little wilder than I was comfortable with but didn’t want to look like the stick in the mud. She would always tell me to, “Blame me. Just say I wouldn’t let you go.” So I did. She didn’t care if she was the “Cool Mom” to my friends or not- and that is what made her cool in the long run. True rebels define themselves.

Memories- mmmm mmmm good

The former glory of what is now known as "The Warehouse District" - first scene at 4th and Colorado, 24th street by campus as showcased in "Slacker". Austin still has some weird, but this was definitely the end of an era. Go rent the whole thing!

11/5/08

I woke up this morning and had to remind myself it was real. And when Lily woke up this morning, her first words were, “Did he win?” It meant so much to hear her say that, not because she likes Barack Obama, because she is just following her parents on that, but that she is interested. She was fascinated with all the results flashing across the screen last night and was full of questions.

I don’t really know how to describe my feelings today. I have already held back tears more times than I will admit. I would have been happy to have this man elected if his skin was any color of the rainbow cause I think he is the best man for the job at hand. We have to admit, though, that it is especially significant that he is a man who, just about 150 years ago, could have been considered property by some people. Last night, seeing Jesse Jackson, a man who was with Martin Luther King, Jr. the day he died, nearly breaking down watching Obama’s victory speech (I am sure with a mixture of pride and some sadness too that he was born just a little too soon) was more than I could handle. This morning watching an impromptu recitation of “I Rise” by a burstingly proud Maya Angelou was something I will always remember, and finally, seeing Donna Brazile note that President-elect Obama will take the Oath of Office on steps that were built by slaves who could have never imagined this event - all of these things reminded me that we are now a part of history- for real.

Now comes the hard part, but we can do it. (Come on, you know the rest.)

To quote Ice Cube

Today was a good day.

Cameron Road Youth Group Reunion

I just wanted to have a space we could comment to each other. It has been too long! Let the memory wash over you...

Growing Up- at 32 years old

So it has been awhile since I actually wrote anything. That will tell you what a whirlwind I have been in. It is a good whirlwind, though. Some major things have changed with my job and commute situation, but that is not all. I have had some things pop up and kick me in the pants as far as some other things in my life are concerned and it got me thinking, how comfortable is too comfortable?

I think I was in a place where I had gotten a bit cocky about how my life was going. (And thinking it was all because of me.) Well, I got a wake up call and I am so glad cause it refocused me to look forward and remember the need to improve on everything, everyday. It isn't discontentment, but a desire to use this life to do something more than make yourself comfortable and happy. I feel like I'm really an adult all of a sudden. I was fighting it all the way. But now all my immature notions are falling down quickly and that is the best thing that could happen. I will avoid saying, "I am woman, hear me roar," but that is kind of how I feel. I guess going back to high school and seeing all these teenagers has reminded me I'm not them anymore. I'm something a lot different, but better.


Preachy sounding, maybe, but it is what has been on my mind- and isn't that what this blogging thing is all about?

Well, otherwise, I have been writing more, creative-wise, and remembering how much I used to like that. I have to say, I could whip up a quick A+ poem 10 minutes before English class in high school, cause I usually forgot to do it as homework the night before. It does use a different part of your brain that sometimes gets left behind when you "grow up". You have to drop that self-editing part of your adult brain and allow yourself to say something that may be a little pretentious or silly, or something someone else may not like, but is almost always honest. And honesty is the whole point.

Wish I could say things as well as this guy (heaven):

A little slice of happy

Stealing from Bianca, my hero

I am stealing this from the email that Bianca sent me. I couldn't say any of it better and it really speaks to me, especially right now. My favorite is that if you don't compare, things just are. Enjoy!

Subject: 7 Attributes of a Successful, Confident Woman!

1) A Confident and Successful woman KNOWS she is Loved.
There will always be people who are not satisfied with what you give. You can't please everyone, that's just reality! there are so many people around you who love you for who you are... Quirks and all!! In the word's of Dr Seuss... Say what you want and do what you say. Because people who mind don't matter and people who matter won't mind! A confidant woman believes in what she does and says and doesn't live doubting herself or her actions.

2) A Confident and Successful woman does NOT live in Fear!
Fear is not real... So many women are afraid of failing and make decisions based on their fears. Therefore, they have already set themselves up for failure. As women, we must overcome whatever fears we have and learn to set them apart from reality! Our fears distort reality and prohibit us from seeing things as they truly are. Women who overcome their fear put their all into what they do because they are not afraid to act upon their emotions and instincts.

3) A Confident and Successful woman is ALWAYS Positive!
Everyone's reality is based off their own perception. Try to immerse yourself in positivity. Don't ask why when something negative happens, think of it as why not me? Mistakes are life lessons and stepping stones to make a better decision next time. When you look at things in a negative fashion you fail to see the bigger picture and often second guess yourself. Believe that everything you do is part of a larger plan. There are always different paths to get somewhere and not everyone takes the same sized steps. Get rid of that negativity! Negativity is viral. It spreads like a virus! If you constantly are surrounded by negative people, you're thinking will be negative too. Surround yourself with positive people.. People who talk positive and act positively can help you be confident about yourself. Your thoughts will become positive. You deserve to have good things happen to you.. WHY you? Why NOT you?

4) A Confident and Secure woman is one that recovers from setbacks.
They key to recovering from setbacks is to see them as normal, part of everyone's journey, and not a failure. Take a "positive spin" on everything. What did you learn about yourself and others from the setback? What do I do to stop it from happening again? Treat yourself with love and respect. It's simply the universe's way of telling you you still need to grow a little... Don't allow your setbacks to stop you from getting to your goal. Once again.. use them as stepping stones....

5) A Confident and Secure woman avoids comparisons!
Avoid comparisons like a plague! Nothing is bigger,smaller or better unless you compare it to something else. Otherwise it just is. For example.. draw three different sized circles on a piece of paper Look at each individually.. would you have know the one was bigger than another by just looking at the one circle? NO...It is JUST a circle. It's not until you look at the other circles that you realize one is bigger or smaller than the other. Same goes for YOU. You are uniquely different in your own way! Why would you WANT to be like someone else? Embrace who you are.

6) A Confident and Successful woman takes action!
The key to getting what you want is taking the idea and attaching an emotion to it and acting upon it! The first question people ask themselves is "how?". Don't focus on the how and just go take action! Take the opportunities as them present themselves. Decide to take action. Use these 3 questions of every opportunity to base your action.:
a) Is it something that I want to be, do, or have?
b) Will it take me closer to my goal?
c) Will it harm someone?
Answer these questions and let them guide you in everything you act upon. Opportunities sometimes require you to step up and go beyond your comfort zone. Everyone's comfort zone is different. This is usually where women stop themselves. They get uncomfortable and they stop acting.... Get out of that zone and work with what you can. Even the smallest step puts you closer to where you want to go. There is no wrong choice. It's simply what you do with your choices that matters.

7) A Confident and Successful woman does not live in the "what ifs" and "If only".
Somewhere out there, there is a woman saying to herself.... If I only had more time, If only I had more help.... etc... Take what you have and use it to get what you want! It all starts with making a decision. Create the life you want! What exists persists. Make the decisions and the universe Will bring the means to you. Use the time you have and do what you can.

These are the secrets I want to always live by. Start living your fantasies and stop dreaming! YOU DESERVE IT!

Things that make my life better part 2

I haven't had the greatest couple of days, but this helps...a lot.

The happiest place on earth

We just got back from 5 days at Disneyworld. So much fun. I am missing the family a lot today since I have been with them 24/7 for a week. My kiddo is officially 8 years old and I am officially the mom of a tween. She totally regressed, in a good way, when she saw Snow White, Belle, etc. and took a picture with them. Anyway, so it is back to work for 2 more weeks and then I start my new trabajo. It will be the first time I have worked somewhere out of downtown Austin since I was 21 years old. Yikes, that is a long time. I will miss the crazy homeless guys talking to themselves, the smell of exhaust, and the fact that you can play live action frogger in the street anytime you want. No, really, I like that stuff. It will be great to get 2 plus hours of my life back since I won’t have any commute. Ahhhhhhh. Just the thought calms me. Well, I will try to update more often in the days to come. For now, just enjoy this.

The Promotion

I am doing my part to promote a new film called ”The Promotion.” I had barely heard of it and Marlon asked if I wanted to go see it. It was really fun, had a great cast, and by the end a really good message. It stars John C. Reilly and Seann William Scott (Stifler for all you guys- although he is like the anti-Stifler in this). Besides them, there are a lot of those people that are just good in everything so it makes for a really well done, small movie. You may choose to wait and rent it, but it is much better than a lot of what is out there now and is a good time. Let me know what you think if you see it.



OH AND GO SEE THE FOOT FIST WAY- It is just silly, but the main dude, Danny McBride is hysterical.

The Women

So they are remaking “The Women” with Meg Ryan and Eva Mendes. My nightmare is complete. “The Women” is a brilliant film made in 1939 consisting of an all female cast (including all female animal actors as well) about Mary Haines, a well-to-do wife of Stephen Haines, who is having an affair with Crystal Allen (a to die for Joan Crawford). What makes it so delicious is the fashion, the cattiness, but mostly the dialogue. It is like the best of the films from the 1930’s with rapid fire dialogue and fantastic acting- mostly overdramatic in the best possible way. Rosalind Russell is hilarious and watching her wrap her mouth around the the words like tongue twisters is just plain fun.It's probably a bit sexist as well, but who cares. It's divine. Well, I have now seen the preview for the new one. It sticks to the story for the most part, which was always the weakest part of the original, but the quick wit and melodrama is gone. We have traded it for a standard “he cheated on you” picture. Candace Bergen does look interesting as Mary’s mother and Eva looks smoking as Crystal (but when you are re-doing Joan, you have some BIG shoes to fill), but I am planning to be severely disappointed. Oh well. Compare for yourselves, but I recommend checking out the original today. You will have to pay attention though. When I say RAPID fire dialogue, I mean it.

I got the job! And it's gonna be AWESOME!

So much happening

So there is a lot going on with me right now. Most likely, I will be starting a job at Lehman High School, just down the street from my house, in July. I still have to iron out the details, but the job is mine if I want it. I have watched and prayed for so long to have an opportunity to work closer to home and this is closer than I ever could have guessed- walking distance, even. It would really improve so many things just because I would have so much more time. No commute, part of the summer off, etc. I am cautiously optimistic that it will all work out. I feel like maybe all that anticipation and keeping my ears open finally paid off.

My mom says I just want to go to high school every day. Ha (she's probably a little bit right.)

Only if I get to chaperone this dance.

Riggins

Tim Riggins. Let me say that again- Tim Riggins. Not since Jordan Catalano has a boy taken over school-girl fantasies as well as their mothers’. I’ve been missing my Friday Night Lights lately and made me remember the ultimate bad boy with the heart of gold. He is definitely smarter than Jordan ever was and that makes him even more appealing. Not much else to say except yum. Enjoy the double feature.

Riggins



Jordan (LOVE this song)

Love it or Hate it?

She's a little nuts, but I kinda love it!



I promise actual blogging soon.

Hotness

Little Edie

I am currently obsessed with “Little Edie” Beale. She is the younger of the two Edies in “Grey Gardens” the 1976 documentary and the cousin of Jackie Kennedy Onassis. She is a little nutty and naïve, but so interesting. She talks at one point about never knowing what time it is- because she doesn’t own a clock. She and her mother really live in a world all their own. I think for the “Big Edie” the arrangement is great. She knows she won’t ever be lonely and her favorite person in the world is there with her every day. Little Edie had once been the it girl of society and had multiple marriage proposals, but turned them all down because “Mother didn’t approve” of the suitors (which included Joe Kennedy, Jr, and J. Paul Getty). It seems like Little Edie missed out on a lot and she knows this and stays anyway. She is sort of stuck in adolescence even though she was in her mid-fifties when it was shot. While some people seem to think her relationship with her mother is so cool and “what an amazing bond” they have as they can’t seem to be without each other. I have to admit, as a mother of a daughter, it scares me a little.
My daughter and I are very close, but I am very conscious of making sure she gets out into the world on her own sometimes as scary as that can be for her or me. Marlon and I try to really let her have her own experiences without us always in them. She went to camp last year and it was scary and nerve-wracking, but she came back so independent and proud of having gone into a situation where she knew no one and made friends and had experiences all her own. I have times when I feel a little callous because I want her to be independent and hope I am not pushing her too much. I want her to be able fight her own battles, like one she is dealing with right now.
She is having the beginning of “girl drama”. We all remember that, don’t we? Between the ages of about 7 and 17, one day you are best friends with someone and the next, they are ignoring you and hanging out with someone else. Mama Bear mode kicks in- I want to call the parent and let them know- I want to talk to the kid and scold her- I want to do anything that will make my baby stop hurting over this. My girl is very resilient and she will deal with this. As much as I want to step in, I am trying not to. If she can’t learn to handle conflict now, what will she do as she gets older and the conflicts get bigger? I’m trying to counsel her to talk to her friend and to tell her it when she feels like she is being slighted, or just play with other kids and let her come to her - play hard to get, if you will. I hope I’m doing the right thing. As interesting as I find Little Edie, I don’t want to have one of my own in 50 years.
That being said, here is a video of her and her unique style (some of it is pretty fantastic and avant garde).

I knew it was coming...

Well, it finally happened. I have been growing in size slowly over the years and just sort of going with the flow. I would love to be 125 lbs again, but it just ain’t gonna happen. I’ve had a problem with motivation to get in shape. See, I have a husband who is still into me, big or small, a daughter who tells me how pretty I am and a family that has always seen the best in me. I’m very lucky. But you want to know a quick way to get motivated to start your exercise regime again? Have a perfectly lovely, well-meaning lady at church come and ask, “So is it a boy or a girl, or do you know yet?” Yup, that’ll do it! I was wearing one of those oh-so-trendy flowy tops with jeans, but just the day before someone had asked if I was losing weight so I was all full of myself. So, today it was low-fat oatmeal for breakfast and a small lunch. I actually do feel much better when I am exercising and eating better, drinking water, but I do love me some good food. So the journey begins, we’ll see how this goes. I think I need some Mika.

Yes We Can Can

Whether we agree on the candidate, I think we all want to make this country better than it is today. The song is all about that- now I think Obama is the man to help get us there, so I am outing myself as an Obama girl. (Let's face it, if you know me at all, you probably figured that out already.)This is a cool video all the same.

This makes my world a happier place

I may have already sent this to some of you, but it is just too awesome. I needed
share again.

"Arty"

So, apparently, it is Miley Cyrus day as that is all over the news. As Johnny Galecki said on The View this morning when asked about the pictures, “ Is the war over or something? Distraction, hello!” Anyway, being that I have a Miley fan living in my house, I just have to say that, to me the picture itself is not terrible, but not a good idea either. It made me think of the time in 8th grade when me and the other Dobie Middle School cheerleaders thought it would be so funny to flash a camera with just our undies on underneath our cheerleader skirts. When I randomly mentioned it to my mother, she froze and began asking who took it, where was the picture now, etc. I was oblivious to why she would be so upset- “Nobody saw it, Mom! It was just us girls in there! You are so overreacting!” Now, I get it. To us it was innocent sillyness, but to the wrong perv that could get his hands on it, it was something much different. That naïveté kept us from seeing that a group of 12 and 13 year-old cheerleaders flashing their butts to the camera was waaaaay inappropriate. What I mean to say is that everyone involved in the shoot may have just meant them as “arty” or as a classic portrait (although I have my doubts that they didn’t want a bit of controversy), which in many ways it is. What it is to the wrong people is something sexual- to my 7 year-old, an excuse that immodesty is no big deal. You can’t just look at something from your perspective. Unfortunately, as a “role model” to some very young children, she and her family really needed to look at it from all angles. There’s my 2 cents. Now back to that whole Iraq thing…

Puzzled

Just reading about the Hamas proposal to Israel. It doesn’t seem to be anything really new. The whole conflict there has always puzzled me a bit. I know now there is a lot of who did what to whom and feelings of wanting revenge from both sides. Did it really start over some land- really? It seems so juvenile- no different than a couple of toddlers fighting over a toy. I realize there is much more to it, so I continue to research, but will probably never be able to really understand it.
I have always been Jimmy Carter fan. He seems like the one guy in the country who actually cares. Maybe it is because he doesn’t have to get elected to anything anymore. He can actually get things done. You notice that Al Gore actually got busy (and more popular) once he took himself out of election situations. Anyway, Jimmy is catching so much slack for talking with Hamas, but it seems that if everyone refuses to talk to each other things won’t ever change. Maybe that is what some want.
Just a thought. I have no insights or solutions. I was just thinking about it.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aT3tgx_qJi0

My Name is Katie

Weezer is coming out with a new album. I can’t express how excited I am. I also can’t really explain why it makes me so happy. Maybe it is a validation of the music of my adolescence that the bands we loved then are still making new and interesting music. Whatever- not getting that deep today.
Except for seeing Prince last year(come on, it’s Prince), the best concert I ever saw was Weezer in 1995 at Liberty Lunch in Austin. It was the whole scene- relatively small club, the mosh pit, the close proximity to the stage, general admission only (God bless general admission- the concert equivalent of survival of the fittest- if you can’t take the heat get out of the pit). It was just one of those nights.
Weezer’s music is such a great combination of things- earnest lyrics, but with a sense of humor- “alternative rock” (whatever that means), but you can tell they listened to cheesy hair bands too- and to me, the sonic quality is so classic. If you were to play a Weezer song with just an acoustic guitar, it would be so lovely and melodic, with all the electric guitar and drums it still is, but it has that booming edge that makes it more intense. Marlon says you cannot listen to Weezer at a normal volume. You have to crank it up to get the full experience. (See why I married him!) Okay so my love poem to a band of over 30 rockers is done. Long live Rivers and company.

Urge for Going

I am having a garage sale on Saturday. I always love having a garage sale- not sure why. I guess it sort of feels like getting something for nothing- just things that were hanging around your house. I always feel lighter after I clear stuff out too. Of course I just get new stuff that I will sell in a few years or so, but it is fluid. I moved around a lot as a kid. Pretty much every 2 or 3 years and maybe that’s where my need for change comes from. I have been working at my current job for 3 years now and I am starting to feel that “urge for going” as Joni would say. I am perfectly happy with everything, but it just feels like time to move on. I think that is the old hippie spirit in me. I’m not sure where it came from, but I have always felt I could have made a very good flower child, Deadhead, etc. I like the idea of change and rolling with the flow and the adventure that could come with something new. I have said before that with a different upbringing, I could have been a real wild one. I guess God knew I needed the parents I got.