Saturday, after the longest of days, I tucked Lily into bed and she looked up at me and said, “Mom, I know it was frustrating and drove you crazy, but I think you did a great job and should do it again.” She was referring to the fall carnival of which I had been the chairperson of the planning committee and one of the main event runners for. (It was one of the things that inspired the blog post before this, to be frank.) It was one of those mom moments you have to take a mental picture of and the next time she screams, “TORTURING MOTHER!” at me, I can take it out and remember how proud she is and that she really does love me.
So my daughter is growing up, daily, before my eyes. She is sharp and sarcastic and opinionated. I am not raising the perfect young lady who acts appropriately at all times, but she knows when to be respectful and when to be funny and already is developing the driest of wits. (Maybe it is all those episodes of the “The Office” and “Seinfeld”.) It kind of blows my mind that she is approaching 10 years old. Double digits! In a lot of ways, a child will always be your baby, but you start finding yourself in the middle of a conversation with them and it hits you, this is an adult conversation. This is a meaningful, important thing we are discussing and it throws you off a little. Maybe they agree with you and maybe they don’t. It is much different than any you had when they still thought you knew everything. Lately, I will laugh at something Lily says or asks and she gets irritated with me because it isn’t “funny”. I explain that I am laughing in amazement at her thought process, how she already seems to be “in on the joke”.
Other times I am reminded how young and naïve she is- like when she realized the death penalty is a real thing and still in practice. She just assumed it was an old fashioned notion that, of course, would have been ended long ago. She said “They still do that!?” her eyes wide in utter disbelief. Discussing segregation, she shakes her head in disgust and says, “soooo stupid,” anytime it comes up. “Why would anyone ever think like that? I just don’t get it!” My personal favorites are her thoughts on misogyny. Watching Sense and Sensibility she was confused as to why the mother and sisters had to move out of their own house so that their half-brother could move in after the father died. I explained, as is it is to a child in the film, that houses went from father to son, not father to daughter. She rolled her eyes.
These were all things she thought of on her own. No prodding or planting of ideas from dear old mom. She is a person with her own opinions and frankly, she could care less what you think about them (which I LOVE!). I guess what I am saying is, I have had a relationship with this girl since she was born (and before, for that matter) and I am still getting to know her. I remember hearing Goldie Hawn once talking about once your child is born, they aren’t really yours anymore. Because they are a separate person now so they belong to themselves. You can guide them and try protect them, but they are their own person. I am beginning to understand what she meant.
So my daughter is growing up, daily, before my eyes. She is sharp and sarcastic and opinionated. I am not raising the perfect young lady who acts appropriately at all times, but she knows when to be respectful and when to be funny and already is developing the driest of wits. (Maybe it is all those episodes of the “The Office” and “Seinfeld”.) It kind of blows my mind that she is approaching 10 years old. Double digits! In a lot of ways, a child will always be your baby, but you start finding yourself in the middle of a conversation with them and it hits you, this is an adult conversation. This is a meaningful, important thing we are discussing and it throws you off a little. Maybe they agree with you and maybe they don’t. It is much different than any you had when they still thought you knew everything. Lately, I will laugh at something Lily says or asks and she gets irritated with me because it isn’t “funny”. I explain that I am laughing in amazement at her thought process, how she already seems to be “in on the joke”.
Other times I am reminded how young and naïve she is- like when she realized the death penalty is a real thing and still in practice. She just assumed it was an old fashioned notion that, of course, would have been ended long ago. She said “They still do that!?” her eyes wide in utter disbelief. Discussing segregation, she shakes her head in disgust and says, “soooo stupid,” anytime it comes up. “Why would anyone ever think like that? I just don’t get it!” My personal favorites are her thoughts on misogyny. Watching Sense and Sensibility she was confused as to why the mother and sisters had to move out of their own house so that their half-brother could move in after the father died. I explained, as is it is to a child in the film, that houses went from father to son, not father to daughter. She rolled her eyes.
These were all things she thought of on her own. No prodding or planting of ideas from dear old mom. She is a person with her own opinions and frankly, she could care less what you think about them (which I LOVE!). I guess what I am saying is, I have had a relationship with this girl since she was born (and before, for that matter) and I am still getting to know her. I remember hearing Goldie Hawn once talking about once your child is born, they aren’t really yours anymore. Because they are a separate person now so they belong to themselves. You can guide them and try protect them, but they are their own person. I am beginning to understand what she meant.
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